When I was a little girl (hmmm that sounds like the beginning of a song) I couldn’t do cartwheels or hand stands. I was kinda uncoordinated and while I did try, I had that awkward knee bending stance. I dreaded gymnastics in school. I dreaded P.E. period. I was not a good runner, always walking and being the last to finish a mile. I was thin at that time too, so it didn’t have anything to do with being overweight. Although I probably thought I was fat. I don’t know what I was so scared of back then.
I daydream about being in shape and walking/running like I was a natural at it. I know I know I can do it with perseverance and practice practice practice, but I am still scared. And still not sure why.
Another thing I daydream about even more is yoga. I have a few friends who do yoga religiously. I even have a friend who teaches it. I am in awe of them. I see their pictures or read their blogs and I am so jealous. I daydream about teaching yoga one day. I daydream about trusting my body enough to do a handstand without worrying about breaking my arms. I envision doing a cartwheel on the beach like my friends did when they were 18. (Yes I know, I am 40…LOL) I think about the whole mind body spirit connection that happens in Yoga and I am envious that I don’t have that. I want it. So why can’t I trust my body enough to get started? What am I afraid of?